aINT it fuNNie

Funnie how the world can take little things for granted..........
Lying down on my bed, reflecting on the 20 soon to be 21yrs of my life....... all I can do is perspire.

Humans are created to feel, to live..........to mulitipy,
We play by Gods rules as well as Man-made rules.
God gave us freewill, but somewhere in between I feel He shouldnt have........
That's our blessing as well as our curse.

I disown my freewill and say God please rule me 100 per cent as this would prevent me from sin. If God is in full control esp of my choices, then I would never be put in the position to sin and hurt Him.

Funnie story, I'm still fooling around with my ex.........
There's a reason his is an ex, but I just cant seem to be able to close the book on him.
Thus giving him the upper power.
One problem I had in the relationship was how he could claim to LOVE me so much
But on the other hand hurt me.
How he could put and see me in so much pain in order to satisfy his gratifications.
How I gave him a choice to have me back and give up his distractions,
But he'd rather have his cake and eat it too.

With all these youd think a 2nd Year Law Student would be wise enough to close/end his chapter.

My ex has put me through so much pain........physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.
The bible says the heart is decietfully wicked, mine is heading for eternal self destruct.

In a way, I still hold on to the soft spot I have for me ex,
He did score some brownie points,
he is a good person....just a little...........nah a lot misguided.
But now, my bones are weak,.......Ive have too much drama in my life right now to be his saviour.
Letting him go would be the hardest thing but it hads to be done.

As of tonight the door is permanently shot.

When all is said and done, I dont blame my ex because I do am guilty of his athrocities.
I claim if you love someone so much and want them so bad that you yearn for them in your soul and spirit, you would never dare to hurt them.

So I ask myself Y DO I HURT GOD.

I dnt intend to, but I admit that I have a split second of choice to revert from committing the crime, But I ignore His feelings for my own selfish desires.

So maybe My ex and I are not totally different.
Maybe he is even better than me,
Cuz his crime is against man and mine is against God.

I sometimes look at couples and laugh all around me............
They spend so much time arguing bout silly things and not focusing on the bigger picture.
One thing theyve taking for granted is the fact that they have eachother.

So when I sit here, alone typing thinking about how all the aspect of my life seem to be falling
apart,
Wishing the atleast with all this commotion Aaron could have been more responsive.
I can only conclude with a wearied tone by saying AINT IT FUNNIE

Reserved for future use..................

Ok lets see......................


In this world there are two kinds of women,
the Beyonces' and the Michelles'

You see don't get it twisted its all black and white, theres no grey.....

I look at myself sometimes and grin,....................

The Beyonces are go-getters, nothing comes in between them and what they want
In the clubs, they get all the attention,
Basically they are freaks,................... One night stands, hell thats like breakfast,

Make out and won't think twice
Their motto is : dnt bother bout calling me the next morning boo.

Guys love em...... I mean who wouldnot.

Now the Michelles are reserved for future use,
The good holy looking gurls,
I mean guys would have to work hard to get em, and finally when you think you've finally got into her pants...................
she cockblocks you with " oh am waiting for the right person or till marriage".....lol


Now I seat back in the club, at the farest end and watch the crowd on the dance floor....
I see three categories of women


One, the highly sexual appealing gurls.... the ones on the dance floor, grinding to the floor and Shaking their behinds,

I mean these heavy set girls are rocking their lives out


Secondly, I see the gurls dancing with other gurls in centre stage,
Don't get me wrong, they into guys,....................... But really picky
These gurls hate being single and spend friday nights talking bout exs' and the criteria of the next man,...............

Funnie thing, they set the standards so high without actually thinking if they are as high as the standard they set. I mean you cant want Brad Pitt and look like Macy Gray....lol

These Second class gurls, play it hard, they want the whole package and believe the next man is the one,
hell............. guys at 20 - 25 are not thinking Marriage fool, they on a sex-marathon


Now the third classed gurls.... are the ones with low esteems and dnt appreciate how they look.
Funny enough if they took care of themselves theyd probably look better....

Feel me, if a gurl is ugly but heavily set.,.... with the right makeup and hair style, guys would digg her.................

But if a guy is ugly,,, no matter how well dressed he cant do anything bout it...lol


Anyhow, due to lack of esteem these gurls are all up in the club dancing hoeish and doing the moves guys like just to get attention,.............
Its not who they are, but they feel thats all they have to appeal to a guy....................
These are mostly the gurls who over do their dressing and feel showing skin is the only way....

I mean, boobs out .... legs out...... stomach out e.t.c..... ass out if possible
Heck, hvnt they heard if you show clevage your legs shouldnt be out and vice versa.... unless its a dress.

So there's me kicking back in the club analysing peeps,
Why you may ask?

Cuz one, im too old for the club scene,.... music has moved on and im still old school
Two, if i get a guy in the club, is he ready to give up teh whole clubbing scene and settle dwn....
em, im thinking not..... so whats the point.



Like I said, your either one or the other,............. ask yourself truely,....
where do you stand.